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Through A Different Lens – How A Person’s Diagnosis Can Distort Our View
I remember sitting in the car thinking, “things are never going to be the same. I will never be capable of the things I was capable of before.” Twenty minutes earlier, I had been sitting on the couch in my psychiatric nurse practitioner’s office hearing the word “schizophrenia.” After that moment, I never saw myself the same. And the longer I live with what is now diagnosed as schizoaffective disorder, the more I see how this shift in view is not unique to me or even only those living with mental illnesses. Parents, doctors – anyone really, can easily slip into viewing someone through a different lens once they receive…
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How She Helped Me – Small Things, Big Impact
To the coworker who helped me when I had a hallucination at work, thank you. When I told you I had a weird question and I didn’t know how to ask, you gave me your full attention. No discomfort, no judgement, you listened. You listened to me say that I had been sitting at my desk working and heard the sound of scratching from the inside of the server room door and I didn’t know if it was real or all in my head. Only a select few people in the office know that I have schizoaffective disorder, including you. But I had never approached anyone in the office with…
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A Young Adult gets a Schizophrenia Diagnosis- My Experience and How to Change It
Imagine, for a moment, a young adult, sitting on the couch in a psychiatrist’s office, shifting anxiously as they wait to hear the answer to their question. The doctor sits in her chair, red nails pressed tip to tip as she puts her hands together. Hesitantly, she gives the young adult the answer they dreaded – “It’s looking to be schizophrenia.” In your mind, who is this young adult? Yourself? Your child or sibling? Or perhaps a stranger? How did you picture them reacting to this news? My guess is, not well. And that would not be surprising. When I received my initial schizophrenia diagnosis, I thought my life was…
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The Impact of my Illnesses on my Significant Other
Meet James. He’s a hardware and software engineer from the same area of California that I’m from. We met back in high school and didn’t really like each other. But 8 years after I moved to Illinois, we reconnected through Facebook. Now he lives with me in Illinois and we’ve been dating for 3 1/2 years. His support is vital to me, and he regularly supports me through symptoms and setbacks related to my obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and schizoaffective disorder. Typically on this blog, you hear my perspective. To give you a fuller idea of the impact my illnesses have on those around me, here is…
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When your child is diagnosed with a schizophrenia spectrum disorder
It’s understandable if your emotions are on high and if fear is flooding through your veins. Schizophrenia and schizoaffective disorder are scary words. You might be wondering what this means for your child’s life. Will they be able to live independently? Will they be happy? As much as I wish that I could, I can’t answer those questions for you, but here’s what I know. Not only has your child’s life changed forever, but yours has too. Whether your child is young or an adult, it’s going to be a complicated road full of obstacles in treatment, education, work, and even just daily life, but no matter how bleak the…
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Schizophrenia and Schizoaffective Disorder – How they’re alike, how they’re different, and what it felt like to get each diagnosis
During my mental health journey, I originally received a schizophrenia diagnosis It sounds strange, but I was a little excited when I received the schizophrenia diagnosis. Not because I wanted to have schizophrenia, but because now I had a reason for why these things were happening to me. I had documented treatment methods. And it was something I could research and learn more about. That was something that was very important for me. Possessing knowledge about it made me feel like I had more control at a time when my world was spinning out of control. The diagnosis also crushed me. At that point, all I really knew was the…
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Reality Checking
During a question and answer session after myself and another speaker shared our stories to educate sheriff officers during Crisis Intervention Training, one of the officers brought up that he has a friend with schizophrenia and his friend will sometimes ask him if he heard or saw something, which is a tool many of us refer to as reality checking. The officer continued, saying he was usually able to confirm the experience as real, but then he asked, “what do I do if it isn’t real?” I cannot stress enough how important this question is, and I have the feeling this is a question many people have, and may or…
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The evolution of a diagnosis
You look “normal” To most people, I look “normal.” I’ve had countless people tell me that I don’t look like I have a mental illness, particularly one as severe as schizoaffective disorder. Sometimes they question what would actually happen if I stop taking my medications. I’ve even had two psychiatrists and an urgent care physician question my diagnosis before really listening to me and my story. What I’ve gathered from all of this is two things. First, the stereotype that all people with schizophrenia are bedraggled and screaming at things that aren’t there is, unfortunately, still alive and well (but we’ll cover that more in another post). Second, I’ve learned…
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On opening up about a diagnosis
Opening up is easier said than done There’s so much fear involved in opening up about a diagnosis or symptoms. It’s incredibly common for people to feel like their loved ones will abandon them or think poorly of them if they speak up about what’s happening. Fear is often joined by denial, and these feelings can be so strong that many people remain silent even as their conditions deteriorate to critical levels. My struggle with speaking up I have a very supportive family who always made it clear that I could tell them anything, but I struggled to tell them about the depression I’d been experiencing since I was a…
- Anxiety, Depression, Eating Disorders, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, PTSD, Schizoaffective Disorder, Schizophrenia
Mental illness isn’t one size fits all
Any time you interact with someone with a mental health condition, there’s one very important thing to remember – as the stereotypes you know from movies and media start creeping into your view of them, remember that everyone is different and mental illness isn’t one size fits all. You know how some people are tall and some people are short? Or how some people have blonde hair and others have brown? Guess what – mental illness is the same way! Sure, some people have those stereotypical symptoms, but a lot of people don’t, and that doesn’t mean they aren’t truly experiencing it or don’t fall under the same class of…