• Anxiety,  Depression,  Obsessive Compulsive Disorder,  Recovery,  Schizoaffective Disorder

    Why My Recovery from Symptoms of Mental Illness Scares Me

    Recovery from mental illness is complicated. Figuring out what recovery will realistically look like is complicated. The actual process of recovery is complicated. And figuring out how you feel about your recovery can be more complicated than others may think. For me, recovery is a lifelong process. Due to the nature of my illnesses, some, if not all, will be with me my entire life. What I’m chasing is stability. And right now, I’m fighting to break free from severe symptoms. It might sound a little ridiculous, but, at this stage, my recovery is full of mixed emotions. I’m excited, but also terrified. In the beginning, things looked bleak. Every…

  • Anxiety,  Depression,  Perfectionism,  Recovery,  Schizoaffective Disorder

    The Pressure of Perceived Expectations – Stories from Recovery

    Can you feel it? That crushing weight that moves so slowly, pressing you down against the ground, until it’s hard to breathe. Pressure is often the enemy of mental health, and it can come from anywhere – yourself, family, employers, teachers, and even people who aren’t intentionally putting pressure on you. My mind manufactures pressure dressed up in an endless number of ways. Expectations begin like icicles. It starts as just a drip. In high school, people expected me to do well simply because that was my pattern. Academics and athletics came easily, but I quickly began to feel as though it were my job to excel. But when the…