feelings Archives – Not Like The Others

Recovery, Schizoaffective Disorder, Schizophrenia

When You Can’t Trust Your Own Brain

May 13, 2022 / 0 Comments

Muddled feelings circle my head as I stare blankly at the computer screen at work. It feels like everyone is upset with me. Like all I do is annoy people and get in the way. But is that just my depression? I read anger on the face of a coworker. But is that just my brain malfunctioning? What was that noise? Was it real? Am I just reading into things too much? I know that reality can slip through my fingers. Even in small ways and without excessive stress, my mind can create thoughts, sensations, and experiences that are not real. How can I trust that my thoughts and responses…

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Katie
Hallucinations, Recovery, Schizoaffective Disorder, Schizophrenia

Suppressed Feelings and Psychosis

July 12, 2020 / 0 Comments

My doctor once told me that I experience my feelings visually. By this, she meant the visual hallucinations I was experiencing at the time were manifestations of the feelings that I was either suppressing or struggling to resolve. But it’s not just visual hallucinations. For several weeks I’ve been experiencing recurring auditory hallucinations. During therapy my doctor again pointed out that these hallucinations are my feelings come to life. It’s not always obvious what they mean though. And there are some for which I have no explanation. Or maybe there’s an explanation and I just have yet to find it. There are others with psychosis who use the meanings behind…

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Katie

Hi, my name is Katie, and over the course of my life, I’ve struggled with mental illnesses like depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, and schizoaffective disorder. My illnesses brought me fear, shame, and a profound feeling of isolation. Recovery wasn’t always easy, but, despite the obstacles, I’ve accomplished a great deal. I graduated from a highly ranked college, hold down jobs, have meaningful relationships, and now speak publicly about living with mental illness, primarily schizoaffective disorder. I created this blog to break down preconceived notions about mental illness, and to show you that, not only can you go on to have a fulfilling life after being diagnosed with a mental illness or brain disease, but also that everyone’s story is unique, and, even when you’re not like the others, you’re not alone. Whether you have a mental illness yourself or are looking to help or better support someone else, know that no matter what you’re going through, there is hope.